Just stuff about me, and the people I come into contact with, no matter how distantly.
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
Eleven Months.
I cannot believe it's been 11 months. Just shy of a year! Where the heck has the time gone?! Well, as I mentioned in previous posts, I don't have a lot of pictures. My photography fun was seriously curtailed by a plethora of issues. So, let's see...
In the past year, I received Deans' List honors ever quarter. The classes have gotten more intense as I went along, so I haven't had as much time to play, It's funny though. The first class I took was very gung-ho about teaching us time management, but it wasn't until this most recent class I'm taking about Personal Finance that I've actually started being able to get off my "Let's do things randomly" wagon and really plan out how I'm spending my time. It may be because the only really big change in my life this year has been the addition of the most amazing man I have ever met, agreeing to see past my incredible stack of baggage and want to share his limited time with me.
What a comedy of errors that started out as! You see, I was on a dating site. I signed up just about the same time, maybe a bit earlier, as starting this here blog. Now needless to say, when you live halfway to the back of beyond, and you have issues with traveling, and you aren't using a really well known site, the options are truly limited. I went on 3 first (and only) dates in 4 years, and was chatting casually with 2 guys off and on. One was fun in a friend kind of way, the way you think "I really like this guy, but thinking about dating him kinda creeps me out". The other I thought was completely wrong for me. I smoke, he doesn't, I'm a cat people, he has dogs. He's a morning person, I'm a night owl, he's a Republican, I'm an Indie... Just total polar opposites, you know? And I really liked talking with him. He would ask me out for coffee on a fairly regular basis, but I was terrified to meet him in person because I thought that the real me over cyber -me would send him packing. Then I hit a very low point. I had just lost a relationship that although mildly toxic, was one that I had counted on. Something I thought was permanent. And even though I was the one that pointed it out and ended it, it was still like *slowly* pulling of a very sticky bandage. Then I went on a "first and last" with someone that spent a week telling me how great I was, how much he liked me, and then suddenly saying "...it isn't going to work out, bye".
That was it. I'd had it. I was going to officially scare away the last guy to ever show interest in me, and get it over with. I was just going to be alone for the rest of my life. Give up. So this time, when he asked me out for coffee, I shocked him half to death by saying yes. Well, now we have a small problem. He had just picked up 2 more jobs. The man is a workaholic. Okay, he's not, but he's very aware and responsible. It had become automatic for him to ask me out, and expect me to politely decline. He said he didn't expect a yes, but he had to try. I asked why, he told me it was because he was in love with my pictures. I said that was a silly reason. He agreed. (:
Our first date was at a diner. We agreed on coffee, and fries with gravy, (What? You put gravy on mashed potatoes don't you?) When the waitress asked if we wanted separate bowls of gravy, he said, "Nah, I trust her cooties." I was really going to hate it when this guy turned around and said he was "not good enough for me" or "You're so great, I can't be with you" or whatever other line he was going to use when he ran. I made no effort at all to hide any of my flaws. I *wanted* him to run. We talked until he was 2 hours late for only his third shift at one of the new jobs. (he dropped that one... for the record) That was the end. I started calling my cell phone my boyfriend. It seemed that there was never a shortage of things to say. Whatever differences we had seemed to not ever get in the way. I fought. I didn't want to get invested in this budding relationship. But he was sweet, everything he said to me he backed up with actions. See, we'd been talking for 4 years, so he knew a lot of my baggage, and he handles it with care. I never asked him to tell me his whereabouts, but he always gave me his schedule for the day. He makes me laugh every single day. He dances with me to no music. He plays with me. He plays! Silly fake arguments about nothing at all, Just anything we can make fun of, we do. He supports my actions, listens to me sort through my decisions, and holds me close whenever he gets near me.
So why, you ask, do you have to suffer through this novel of a post? Because everyone else is sick of hearing it, and I can't tell it often enough. It has only been 5 months, but in that time, we have stuffed a years worth of relationship. And even though I still worry now and then that something will happen to snatch it away, I'm finally letting myself hope that nothing will.
As usual my dear friends
Thanks for Noticing me!
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